Just thoughts

I have noticed that from around 3 in the afternoon, there is a certain calm, a peace that comes upon me. Whatever has been wearing me down, just seems to alight! Gosh i love that time of day! Maybe coz its closer to sunset, and i love the gentle breeze that really just seems to whisper my name. I get quite tickled by it...
 Which just makes me think and believe that everything is going  to be OK. I could be hurting and trying to find a way to soothe the dull ache, then it happens, a burst of joy, a whisper of love. I'm just so blessed to be able to experience joy in the midst of a storm. But this only comes when you fully put your trust and reliance in God. He is the only sane thought that passes through my head every now and again.
And man, I feel good when i can just sit here and post something onto my blog. It's such a release! Man i tell you, had it not been for God who holds me ALL the time, i shudder to think what would have become of me. This is my space where i can express my love and gratitude to Him. Man i love my God! There is freedom and joy, and so much love whenever I'm in His presence.
Even as i write this, I'm already feeling it coming on...It's like i can feel Him so close to me, smiling and assuring me that all is well.

Its amazing how He can be God, and friend at the same time; so Magnificent, yet so humble! WOW can you imagine such contrasts! (pause, sigh, and breath).
If i tell you right now that i just feel like laughing, dancing, and crying all at he same time, you'd think i'm crazy, but i'm not. His love captivates me so much. I'm enthralled.
Which brings me to a million dollar question, is there a man who can express this kind of love to me. I can't rely on him, i know, to bring me total joy, but will he encourage this joyfulness, will he pray to God to increase His joy in me, because he loves to see me so happy? Hmmm...i pray so.
Coz i realize now that true joy comes only from God, not a man. I suppose i get why Paul the apostle lived as a single guy. He got to a point where all he wanted was God and was so desperate and hungry for Him that it consumed his time and passions! Wow! I want to be consumed by Him! Engulfed.
That saying that says, i could just eat you up, i want Him to just wanna eat me up, and do!

Lalalalalala! I probably should stop here lest they come for me thinking I'm nuts!